As a kid I imagined being a doctor when I grew up. I had a little toy doctor kit and I would do check ups on my stuffed animals. I remember one time even setting up a "clinic" in our house, making charts for all of my family members and taking appointments one by one in the little cubby under the stairs.
I told an adult in my life around that time that I wanted to grow up to be a doctor and they said something to the effect of "maybe you should be a nurse instead." I didn't know if that was because I was a girl or because I wasn't smart enough, but it hurt my little self so much that I put the thought out of my head for almost another 20 years.
When we moved to South Carolina, Dan had evening work hours and I was looking for a job with a flexible schedule so I could be off when he was too. A new friend mentioned medical transcription to me as a possibility and within a few weeks of her suggestion I was enrolled in school.
As I began digging into the curriculum, my fascination with medicine became renewed. I found myself over the coming months and years devouring as much information about the field as I could, whether it be from work, reading books, or from Discovery Health (while I do love Grey's, I don't count that!). The dream I had as a little girl became renewed.
I've felt very strongly over the last 6 years that I've been called to the field of medicine, but with one of the wonkiest (yep, that's the technical medical term. Just kidding) backs in the history of mankind, my dream has felt unattainable.
I've been praying a lot lately about how I might be more involved with medicine. Yes, at this point, it would take nothing short of a miracle for me to realize my childhood, and now adult, dream of becoming a doctor. I do believe that miracles like that do happen sometimes, but I'm slowly becoming okay with the idea that maybe that's just not God's plan for my life. That isn't to say God hasn't called me to the field and doesn't have another awesome plan for me and my passion.
As I am headed into this time of being a patient myself, I'm trying to actively think of ways I can ease the burden others. While my back problems may seem like a big deal to me, stories like this one remind me there are far more pressing medical needs in this world.
I don't know what's n store for my future with my back or my future in the field of medicine, but I am committing to not allow my physical shortcomings to stop me from doing something.
Helping isn't just for the physically able or those in perfect health. There are so many needs that we can attend to with monetary support, prayer, or even just lending an ear to someone who is struggling.
I still hold out hope that my surgery will be successful and I will one day not too far in the future be able to pursue my dream of the field of medicine, whether it's as a doctor, a nurse, or something else entirely that I haven't yet considered.
In the meantime though, I'm going to stop thinking about my own physical pain for a while and start taking care of others in the ways that I can.
Want some ideas on how you can help provide medical care without becoming a practitioner yourself? Check out these resources:
World Vision Medical Care
Doctors Without Borders
Compassion International Health & Medical Needs
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